56 Comments
User's avatar
⭠ Return to thread
MCD's avatar

I’ve been thinking a lot about the FB group I think you’re referring to. It’s extremely rich of the five people who comment in that group to make any claims whatsoever about FOIA GRAS. That group is the most toxic public forum I’ve ever had the displeasure of being a part of. I stay in it because I’m worried about the influence it might have over the board elections, given the sheer number of folks (albeit silent ones) in the group. Someone needs to step in. And I’m quickly approaching a DNGAF mentality where I might just do it at some point.

Expand full comment
Pablo's avatar

A few things that really irk me about the existing one...

A) who elected the admins and mods? Are they representative of the 4500 members of the group or just a vocal minority that wants to have elevated position?

B) Those admins and moderators don't even consistently enforce adherence to the "Group Rules"...

-2: "Be Relevant" why are there so many posts around adult events that aren't specific to education and caregiving for K-8 kids?

-3: "No insults"...I see plenty of that going around!

-4: "Be Courteous. Create a welcoming environment. Use appropriate language and community standards for communication. No tone policing allowed and graciousness is expected" Absolutely laughable that this is a rule.

-5: "No Hate Speech or Bullying" The vocal few love to get into semantic arguments about what constitutes bullying, so I'll leave that alone, but the description of this one goes on to say "degrading comments about things like race, religion, culture, sexual orientation, gender or identity will not be tolerated." I've seen plenty of that be tolerated. Just because you use the spelling "whyte" in expressing your disdain and stereotyping an entire racial population of Evanston doesn't mean you're not making degrading comments.

-7: "Respect Privacy and Maintain Trust (Exceptions)" First, what are these "exceptions"? Second, the description says "What's shared in this group stays here". I realize I'm breaking that "rule" by making this post, but you also have some of the most vocal people on there saying things like "I HOPE a parent is screenshotting this to use it against you". The description also goes on to say "NEVER doxx, share anyone’s medical history, mental health status, **negative personal information** from elsewhere on the internet" -- oh, you mean like Lady Dog Whistledown didn't pull in negative personal info in from elsewhere on the internet?

-9: "Receiving Feedback - If you are the recipient of critical feedback and feel uncomfortable, stay calm and ask for clarification. Do not dismiss, belittle or mock." It is quite literally part of the playbook the shoutymcshouty pants posse to dismiss, belittle, and mock people they think have said something offensive, even if unintended.

Impact vs. intent doesn't give you carte blanche to be an asshole to people, full stop. But that's a big reason why, among 4500 members in that group, we have so little meaningful dialogue or community to show for it -- and why people seek anonymity where it's offered. For 99% of people it's not because we want to transact in racism, ableism, or otherwise attack or belittle marginalized communities. It's because so many people's concerns are disqualified or dismissed without being reasonably heard. It's amazing when you look at the admins, their "rules" they don't really bother enforcing, and their seemingly unwavering support for current/recent boards and admins, you realize the similarities between the two in how they selectively respect rules and guidelines.

Expand full comment
Tim's avatar

Having never been a member of the FB group, what I don’t understand is why people continue to post there, let alone engage in pointless arguments with what sounds like the group of trolls serving as admins.

Also, if it’s not a D65 affiliated group, what is stopping someone from starting a splinter group?

Expand full comment
Pablo's avatar

I think it's exactly as Megan explained. Unfortunately, it's not as simple as just starting a new group. I think there actually is one. But there would have to be a more effective means of bringing people over from the one in question. So then you have this problem that certain people seem to have larger megaphones to an audience of 4500 people with a vested interest in D65. I think that number amounts to about 1/2 of the votes cast in the 2023 election!

Additionally, many who would otherwise comment there have come here for a similar purpose. Only real difference is we just have a comment section vs. having dedicated forums and threads not necessarily tied to a specific post Tom published.

Expand full comment
Chatty's avatar

It would also be helpful if a D65 parent started a new D65 Facebook group that is not beholden to a single ideological viewpoint. Many parents may be interested in a new forum.

Expand full comment
Tom Hayden's avatar

Moderating that would be my personal nightmare

Expand full comment
Rocky Racco's avatar

Therapists did this earlier this month. There’s a group on Facebook called TIPP (therapists in private practice). It became an absolute cesspool of ideological hate. Bullying or banning anyone who swayed from a very narrow worldview of who is the oppressed and how to navigate anti-racist/anti-imperialist therapy. It has 25k and many people did not join for the same reasons. Many joined to be up to date with professional news, updates, resources. Anyway, a group was formed called the NTIPP (new therapists in private practice). NTIPP is sooopoo much safer. There is no sudden crash of a discussion that derails the process of discourse into shame. It’s fascinating to feel the difference having been in both online spaces. Despite what TIPP says about NTIPP, it’s not a MAGA playground. It’s just the information without the burning down of people’s spirits.

If you start it, I recommend the New D65 Parents & Guardians. ND65P&G.

Expand full comment
Northsider's avatar

There is one! Been a little quiet lately but maybe that's because the other group has been occupied with other things and it's hard to spin the tsunami of bad news that keeps coming.

https://facebook.com/groups/243765297320242/

Expand full comment
Disgruntled Taxpayer's avatar

Be careful because they screenshot everything. I’ve left almost every Evanston group for this reason.

Expand full comment
Tony Toni Tone Police's avatar

Absolutely. A notable plaintiff in a lawsuit brought against the City of Evanston has been using screenshots of people's comments on facebook ... to try to prove that there's a Global Conspiracy against him?

Truly unhinged and reprehensible behavior. As if something on a facebook group for D65 students is grounds for city commission members to say that a large community outcry is just "white people shit".

Expand full comment
Disgruntled Taxpayer's avatar

Specifically, Tone Police, there are screenshots in this lawsuit (which Tom has previously written about) being used from the Evanston CASE group, which is for parents of kids with special educational needs in the Evanston school districts. It takes a special kind of person to think it's ok to screenshot things from this kind of group and use it for their lawsuit.

Expand full comment
Tom Hayden's avatar

Are you guys talking about the Bird case?

Expand full comment
Tom Hayden's avatar

That's a wild one

Expand full comment
MCD's avatar

I’m ok with that. It can’t go on like this.

Expand full comment